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Father’s Day 2007

By Jesse Kornbluth
Published: Jan 01, 2007
Category: Beyond Classification


Father’s Day 2007

My grandmother believed “Mr. Ed” really was a talking horse, or why would he be on television. By that standard of credulity, many viewers must regard commercials starring Joe Average as a true portrait of the American man — a doofus who means well, but is dumb, inept, unromantic in the extreme.

Clearly, research has been done. And I guess many American women — the obvious target of these commercials — respond to this view of American men. That is, they recognize these cartoon characteristics in the men they’ve married and work with.

Good luck to those women. And to the men they’ve pledged to honor.

I’ve chosen a different fallacy to believe in — smart men and smart women tend to share common interests. That’s one reason they’re together. And why they just might stick together.

My interests are a cross-sexual checkerboard: sports and culture, fashion and business, gossip and history. The women I like — and especially my wife — share my interests. Or rather, they share our common interests through the prism of their gender. Which is, say I, a modest filter, not a dramatic difference.

But I don’t present myself as a Representative Man. For Father’s Day, I have no consumer desires. My idea of a great present is a microcredit loan — if you’re of like mind, go to Kiva. org. Don’t know about microcredit? Give Dad (and yourself) Banker to the Poor, by Nobel winner Muhammad Yunus.

Or consider these…..


Altec Lansing iM9 inMotion Portable Speaker System for iPods: Does Dad travel?

Shure E3c Sound Isolating Earphone Stereo Headphones: Finally! Sound that’s good enough for Dad

JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank: for the Dad who has everything


James Salter: "Please allow me to introduce myself…I’m a man of wealth and taste…”

Guy de Maupassant — Bel-Ami is young, handsome, devoid of talent. Except this: women adore him. Think he’ll make it?

The Extraordinary Adventures of Arsene Lupin: He’s a gentleman burglar, the dark side’s James Bond. Delish.

Falling Man: Don DeLillo’s 9/12 novel. For the Serious Reader.

Identity Theory: Peter Temple is a much cooler thriller writer than [fill in the blank].

The Foreign Correspondent: Alan Furst is a much cooler thriller writer than [fill in the blank].

Nerve Damage: Peter Abrahams is a much cooler thriller writer than [fill in the blank].

It Might Have Been What He Said: Treat a professional New York woman badly and this is what you get.

Love in the Time of Cholera: He loved her so much he was willing to wait…for decades.


A Walk in the Woods: Bill Bryson has a funny idea of “exercise.”

Deep Economy: A change is gonna come. Is this it?

Deep Survival: More valuable than a Boy Scout first-aid kit

Here, There and Everywhere: If he loves The Beatles…..

The Joy of Drinking: Just don’t ask me to put up bail….

The Omnivore’s Dilemma: Does he care what he eats?

Lonely Avenue: A great biography of Doc Pomus, the legendary rock songwriter

Take Five: A great biography of Paul Desmond, the legendary jazz saxophonist

Somewhere : If Dad likes dance, theater, ballet….

My Father’s Secret War: What Dad couldn’t tell for 50 years…

Bistro Cooking: If Dad must cook, let it be simple, fast and French.


Junior Wells: raw Chicago blues from a manly man.

Antsy McClain and the Trailer Park Troubadors: It’s funnier if Dad’s not “living in aluminum.”

Alison Krauss: She’s so much more than a pretty face.

John Prine: Because he’s Been There.

J.J. Cale:  merely the sharpest blade in the Okie Soul drawer.

Astral Weeks: Is life worth living without this Van Morrison classic?

Arcade Fire: loud, inspiring, helpful when working out

Roxy Music: seduction, old school

Tricky: seduction, new school

Leonard Cohen: because he’s touched a perfect body with his mind.

John Fogerty/Creedence: the king of swamp rock

Dr. John: the king of Cajun rock

Sandy Bull: None of Dad’s friends has this. They’ll all want it.

Beethoven Violin Concerto: Is there anything more beautiful?

Herbie Mann: hard-bopping jazz. Dad will strut.

Mitch Hedberg: funny, funny, funny.


Eddie Izzard: funny, funny, funny (PG-rated)

Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle: funny, funny, funny (R-rated)

Enough! Hope this helps.