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Mother’s Day, 2016

By Jesse Kornbluth
Published: Apr 28, 2016
Category: Beyond Classification

My mother is 99. We’ve been doing this Mother’s Day dance for so long we’re pretty good at it. The relationship part, anyway. I’m grateful. And she’s grateful. And that pretty much says it all.

Presents are more challenging. What do you give a woman who loves her sons and tolerates her daughters-in-law? A Lexus and a chauffeur would be nice, but out of our league. So…small things. Kits. Collections of things she likes and uses and, over the course of a year, uses up.

Example: Years ago my wife declared allegiance to L’Artisan Nuit de Tubereuse Eau de Parfum. My mother liked it, so I started getting it for her. The other day, I went to Barney’s, where I always shop for L’Artisan, and bought a bottle for my mother at $166 (with tax: $178) and another for my wife. (See for yourself: $166 at Barney’s.) On a whim, I checked Amazon. All L’Artisan Perfumes — not just Tuberose — are $65 on Amazon. I returned the gifts to Barneys, replaced them at Amazon. I feel smart. You can too. To buy L’Artisan Tuberose at Amazon for $65 — do poke around Amazon for other L’Artisan fragrances — click here.]

Flowers? Chocolate? Sure. I send them. But they’re generic. A collection of small things that says you actually thought about the recipient for a minute might just be a bigger hit. Here, salted with a few big ticket items, are the makings of a kit.

Ella Fitzgerald & Louis Armstrong: Porgy & Bess
Set aside the achievement of George and Ira Gershwin in transforming DuBose Heyward’s novel into a folk opera. Let’s just focus on Armstrong and Fitzgerald, who were at the peak of their popularity when this record was made in 1957. Fitzgerald sings a verse. She is cool and formal. A lady. Not to be taken lightly. Now it’s Armstrong’s turn. Tender, but let’s not kid ourselves — this is not singing as others define it. This is melodic speech: rough, gutteral. And thus he is ideally cast: His Porgy may have his charms, but he’ll have to stretch to keep Bess.

The Filson Duffle Bag
The Louis Vuitton duffle looks pretty as it’s being carried off a private jet. It should — it sells for $1,760. And it may not be of Filson quality. Filson’s Tin Cloth is virtually bulletproof. Certainly waterproof. Rustproof brass zipper and storm flap closure. Two inner pockets. Rugged handles and shoulder strap. Cost: under $395. Guarantee: a lifetime.

Diptyque candles
A Diptyque candle costs more, but it’s a smart buy because it lasts much longer than most other candles — between 50-60 hours. And once it fills a room with scent, you can blow it out and the room will continue to be gently perfumed for hours. And… it’s better.

Anthelios Sunscreen with Mexoryl
What’s so great about Anthelios with Mexoryl? Dr. Vincent DeLeo, Chairman, Department of Dermatology, Founding Director, Skin of Color Center, St. Luke’s-Roosevelt and Beth Israel: “It produces a product which gives us almost perfect protection against sunshine.” Dr. Darrell Rigel, clinical professor of dermatology at New York University: Mexoryl “is the No. 1 individual ingredient in terms of protection from Ultraviolet A radiation.”

Georgia
This uniquely American chronicle — told in this novel by O’Keeffe — starts as the tale of a woman with a good story and a killer bod. A tale of Branding and Marketing/ well, she has a man who wants the best for her and knows how she can get it. But in the end, this is a book about a talent so fierce it crushed pretty much everything in its path — a rare story of artistic triumph.

V is for Vegetables
A great many cooks have adopted the vegetables-at-the-center-of-the-plate religion, with animal protein as a side dish, garnish, afterthought — or non-presence. Michael Anthony hasn’t surrendered to the Meme of Vegetables. He includes fish and meat recipes “because that’s the way I eat.” He just happens to like to eat vegetables more: “I am a cheerleader saying, ‘Hey, you can do this. Give it a try.’ I tell readers, ‘Set yourself up like this in the kitchen and you’ll be able to cook this quicker.’”

Clarisonic Skin Care
A doctor friend — a distinguished doctor, at that — advised us to get this. “This isn’t just good, it’s not just useful,” he said. “It’s magic.” That’s literal truth. How do I know? My wife uses it twice a day. Why is the Clarisonic so great? Because it doesn’t scrub. It cleanses — a sonic frequency of more than 300 movements per second works on your skin to clean it, then smooth it.

Borgen
A female President? It happens in “Borgen.” And although Birgitte Nyborg — in the series, Denmark’s first female prime minister — is torn between keeping the support of her modest majority and being a good wife and mother, she really does do it all. She even moves the country forward. Until she’s brought down. And has to come back. “The West Wing” in Denmark? Maybe better.

Burr Coffee Grinder
If you’re serious about coffee, you want what the pros use: a burr grinder. A burr grinder may give you the choice of as many as 16 speeds, but because it runs at a slower speed, it generates less heat. The burrs create uniform grounds. And you get better coffee.

Top of the Lake
In 1993, Jane Campion got an Academy Award nomination as Best Director — only one other woman has ever been nominated — for “The Piano.” In a series, “Top of the Lake,” she makes a thriller. A twelve-year-old girl, fully clothed, walks into the lake. She’s pulled out, examined, found to be five months pregnant. Who’s the father? She won’t say. And then she disappears. And then the hunt turns into a much larger search.

Radioactive: Marie & Pierre Curie, A Tale of Love and Fallout
Marya Sklodowska, a brilliant student from Poland, came to Paris to study at the Sorbonne. In 1894, she met Pierre Curie, an iconoclast who taught physics and chemistry. How deep was their love? As Pierre wrote to her, “It would be a fine thing … to pass our lives near to each other, hypnotized by our dreams; your patriotic dream, our humanitarian dream, and our scientific dream.” The Curies discovered radioactivity and, in 1903, won the Nobel Prize for Physics. In 1911, she won the Nobel Prize for Chemistry; she’s one of only two scientists to win the Nobel in a second field. Eventually, radiation killed her. A story you know? Not told this way.

Bach, The Goldberg Variations
In 1741, a Russian count who lived in Leipzig had trouble sleeping. To calm his nerves, Count Kaiserling ordered Johann Gottlieb Goldberg, his personal pianist, to play in the next room. And the Count asked Johann Sebastian Bach to provide Goldberg with some clavier pieces — music that would be soothing but cheerful. Bach, at the height of his genius, was not about to knock off some insignificant ditties. Instead, he produced what’s been described as “the most serious and ambitious composition ever written for harpsichord.” Recorded by Glenn Gould.

Sharon Olds
Parents, lovers/husbands, children. Sharon Olds deals mostly — I could almost say: deals only — with the big topics. “Do what you are going to do, and I will tell you about it,” she writes at the end of a poem about her parents, and that’s the strength of her work; it’s just the facts she thinks you need, plus her take on them. Mom will recognize what she has in common with her.

Aretha: Lady Soul
Ever since the Kennedy Center Honors, Aretha Franklin has been a trending topic. She was there to sing Carole King’s “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman,” and sing it she did — a few seconds in, President Obama was wiping a tear from his eye. And the audience was on its feet and cheering long before she finished. That song — along with “Chain Of Fools,” “Money Won’t Change You,” “People Get Ready,” “Since You’ve Been Gone (Sweet Sweet Baby),” “Good To Me As I Am To You,” “Ain’t No Way,” “Chain Of Fools” and “Groovin’” — can be found on “Lady Soul,” which Amazon is selling for a ridiculous $3.99.

“The Bee Cottage Story: How I Made a Muddle of Things and Decorated My Way Back to Happiness”
Here is Frances, on page 1, buying a run-down cottage as “the perfect place to begin my second marriage.” Which didn’t happen. Nice guy, bad fit. And there she was, in “a spot that illuminates the space between where we are and where we thought we’d be…in a sea of fear, self-loathing and self-doubt.” Well, if she couldn’t fix herself, she’d fix the house. It wasn’t much of a goal — “a point of light in a big dark room, but it was something.” This is not really a book about decorating and gardening.

May and Axel Vervoodt: Recipes
The Vervoordts live in a 50 room castle near Antwerp. Axel is an art and antiques dealer and a decorator whose clients include Sting, Pierre Bergé, Henry Kravis and Bill Gates. May heads the textile and fabric division. But her greater skill may be in the domestic arts. “When May prepares a table,” Axel writes, “the result is like a still-life painting.” And the visuals are the least of it. “May believes food is energy and has the power to make people feel better, spiritually as well as physically,” Axel writes. “Cooking can be a great pleasure, and just as for the potter who sculpts clay, the skill is a craft and the creation is a work of art.” Easy art, it turns out. Simple art. Quick art. Most of May’s recipes require just 20-30 minutes to prepare.

The Filson briefcase
We have entered a zone that prizes authenticity, and in a sea of products that look good but quickly fall apart, the Filson briefcase is so well designed and so well made it could be the last briefcase you’ll ever buy. At $265, that makes it a bargain.

Pu-erh tea
Reader Review: “Two years ago I found out yet again my triglycerides were high. The next day you recommended a fermented tea that Alice Waters said lowered her triglycerides. I drank it every day for a year and then forgot about it. Just got new blood work done. Triglycerides are fine.” Tastes great. Unique packaging.

Rupert Everett: Red Carpets and Other Banana Skins
The first volume of Rupert Everett’s memoirs is 400 pages of delight. It’s amazingly direct for an actor who still hopes to work in show business. Witty? I often laughed so hard I couldn’t breathe. Indiscreet? Lauren Bacall told him, “You are the wickedest woman in Paris.” Wise? He has everybody’s number, starting with his own. And you can buy it for as little as a penny (plus shipping).

Married Sex
A husband and wife, married for 20 years, have devised a novel way to protect their marriage — if you’re tempted to cheat, bring that person home. Or as the line on the movie poster might say: “It’s not cheating if your wife’s there.” A delicious dirty book? Only on one level.

Head Butler Creative Services
Does Mom dream of writing? Does she have pages locked in a drawer? Maybe she’d like a thoughtful reading of her work. I know a guy who does that.

Head Butler: The 100 Essentials
When I was a too-smart-for-his-own-good teenager, one of my heroes was Pico della Mirandola (1463 – 1494), a Renaissance philosopher who, at 23, wrote 900 theses that, he said, held all human knowledge. I thought that was extremely cool, so in 2004, I launched HeadButler.com. I thought I’d write 900 reviews and stop. I’m now well over 2,000. In this book, I’ve picked 100 favorites.