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Weekend Butler: Kurt Vonnegut. Elephants in Mourning. The ending of “The Sopranos.” And 3 remarkably human stories.
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Published: Nov 04, 2021
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Weekend
The news of the week is rarely good, and this week is no exception. Hard to believe, but the Supreme Court will rule on a NRA argument that the Constitution allows us not only to own guns but, for self-defense, to carry them everywhere. Joe Manchin still acts like he’s President. And the election results have been reported as a bummer for the actual President. In a stroke of what I call “white magic,” voters repudiated Toni Morrison novels, vaccine mandates and easy access voting — as someone wrote on Twitter, “Remember to turn your clocks back 1 hour on Sunday at 2:00 a.m. People in Virginia will turn their clocks back 50 years.”
But wait! Heather Cox Richardson to the rescue:
The Virginia governor’s race almost always goes against whichever party is in the White House; indeed, journalist Eric Boehlert, who studies the press, noted that this pattern is so well established that in 2009, during President Barack Obama’s first term in office, when Democrats lost the races for governor of New Jersey and Virginia, the New York Times published only a single piece of analysis, saying “the defeats may or may not spell trouble for Democrats.” Boehlert noted that the New York Times has already posted at least 9 articles about Democratic candidate Terry McAuliffe’s loss last night in Virginia.
Maddow takes you through election results in the first year of many president’s terms. Watch and learn.
The Former Guy talks about “fake news.” Well, in this case, the real news is the fake news — it got the election story completely wrong. Richardson and Maddow: they got it right.
But you may feel glum. What might help?
This week I watched a screener of an unusual documentary. “Kurt Vonnegut: Unstuck in Time” won’t be released until November 19. (Here’s the trailer.) I saw a lot of Kurt in the last two decades of his life. Yeah, he was funny. And also sad. Above all, I think he was wise, especially about loneliness. So this weekend’s edition has a thesis: what to do about loneliness. Here are some stories.
THE ELEPHANTS MOURN A HUMAN FRIEND
Lawrence Anthony was a legend in South Africa. He bravely rescued wildlife and rehabilitated elephants all over the globe from human atrocities, including the courageous rescue of Baghdad Zoo animals during US invasion in 2003.
On March 7, 2012, Lawrence Anthony died.
Two days after his passing, wild elephants (in the photo, above) showed up at his home, led by two large matriarchs. Separate wild herds arrived in droves to say goodbye to their beloved ‘man-friend.’ A total of 31 elephants had walked over 12 miles to get to his South African House.
Witnessing this spectacle, humans were obviously in awe not only because of the supreme intelligence and precise timing that these elephants sensed about Lawrence’s passing, but also because of the profound memory and emotion the beloved animals evoked in such an organized way: Walking slowly, for days, making their way in a solemn one-by-one queue from their habitat to his house. Lawrence’s wife, Francoise, was especially touched, knowing that the elephants had not been to his house prior to that day for well over 3 years!
And yet they knew where they were going. The elephants obviously wanted to pay their deep respects, honoring their friend who’d saved their lives — so much respect that they stayed for 2 days 2 nights without eating anything. Then they left, making their long journey back home.
LIGHTER MOMENT: FRANZ KAFKA’S DRAWINGS? THEY’RE SUNNY!
Seeing is believing. Look here.
“IT’S AN OLD STORY. I HAD A FRIEND AND WE SHARED EVERYTHING, AND THEN SHE DIED AND SO WE SHARED THAT.’’
Caroline Knapp drank, and then she got sober, only to die in June of 2002, when she was forty-two, seven weeks after she was diagnosed with stage-four lung cancer. She had a best friend, Gail Caldwell. Also a writer, who won the Pulitzer Prize for Criticism in 2001. She too had alcohol issues.
Two women writers. Both dog lovers. Both recovering alcoholics. Both living alone and liking it. Both athletes. Near-neighbors in Cambridge, Massachusetts.
Friends. Best friends. One died. The other wrote a book: “Let’s Take the Long Way Home: A Memoir of Friendship.”
Near the end, I asked him [Caroline’s former therapist] what he thought was happening, and he said, “Tell her everything you haven’t said,” and I smiled with relief. “There’s nothing,” I said. “I’ve already told her everything.”
Can you imagine that? I can’t.
[To read more on Butler and buy the book, click here.]
A LIGHTER MOMENT: THE JOHN WATERS RESTROOMS AT THE BALTIMORE MUSEUM OF ART
The Baltimore Museum of Art recently dedicated new gender-neutral restrooms for artist, Baltimore icon, and BMA Trustee, John Waters. The new bathrooms and communal washroom will open to the public on December 12. Twitter comment: “It was the most fun waiting to use the bathroom ever.”
“WHAT IF THAT WOMAN HAD GOTTEN AN ANGRY DRIVER, OR ONE WHO WAS IMPATIENT TO END HIS SHIFT?”
I arrived at the address and honked the horn. After waiting a few minutes, I honked again. Since this was going to be my last ride of my shift, I thought about just driving away, but instead I put the car in park and walked up to the door and knocked..
‘Just a minute,’ answered a frail, elderly voice.
I could hear something being dragged across the floor.
After a long pause, the door opened. A small woman in her 90s stood before me. She was wearing a print dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebody out of a 1940’s movie.
By her side was a small nylon suitcase. The apartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All the furniture was covered with sheets.
There were no clocks on the walls, no knickknacks or utensils on the counters. In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware.
‘Would you carry my bag out to the car?’ she said.
I took the suitcase to the cab, then returned to assist the woman.
She took my arm and we walked slowly toward the curb.
She kept thanking me for my kindness.
‘It’s nothing.’ I told her. ‘I just try to treat my passengers the way I would want my mother to be treated.’
‘Oh, you’re such a good boy,’ she said.
When we got in the cab, she gave me an address and then asked, ‘Could you drive through downtown?’
‘It’s not the shortest way,’ I said.
‘Oh, I don’t mind,’ she said. ‘I’m in no hurry. I’m on my way to a hospice.’
I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening.
‘I don’t have any family left,’ she continued in a soft voice. ‘The doctor says I don’t have very long.’
I quietly reached over and shut off the meter.
‘What route would you like me to take?’ I asked.
For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator.
We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl. Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing.
As the first hint of sun creasing the horizon, she suddenly said, ‘I’m tired. Let’s go now.’
We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a low building, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passed under a portico.
Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as we pulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move.
They must have been expecting her.
I opened the trunk and took the small suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in a wheelchair.
‘How much do I owe you?’ she asked, reaching into her purse.
‘Nothing,’ I said.
‘You have to make a living.’
‘There are other passengers.’
Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.
‘You gave an old woman a little moment of joy,’ she said. ‘Thank you.’
I squeezed her hand, and then walked into the dim morning light. Behind me, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life.
I didn’t pick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly, lost in thought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if that woman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end his shift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, then driven away?
On a quick review, I don’t think that I have done anything more important in my life.
We’re conditioned to think that our lives revolve around great moments.
But great moments often catch us unaware, beautifully wrapped in what others may consider a small one.
LIGHTER MOMENT: DAVID CHASE REVEALS WHAT HAPPENED AT THE END OF ‘THE SOPRANOS.”
“People wanted to know that Tony was killed. They wanted to see him go face-down in linguini.” And much more.
DO YOU HAVE A LEVOIT AIR PURIFIER?
If you bought this air purifier, it’s strongly recommended that you change the filter every 6 to 8 months. [To buy the purifier or a replacement filter from Amazon, click here.]
